And yes, Im late with writing this one. I had to give it - a great deal of thought.
You turned three, last week.
You love robots, and cars, and puppies, and your faverate color is bright red. You follow me around and try to help me with everything, and if you could be cuddled all day, I think you would be.
You have the most gentle touch in the world. Even Mena, our most delicate cat, so badly abused before we got her, adores you, and lets you pet her. She sits with you, when you are sick, or upset - which is often.
You are an emotional little boy. Its a constant roller coaster of ups and downs. You hate loud noises, and your sister, teasing you.
And she teases you ceaselessly. She knows she can get away with it, most of the time.
You share everything, and never say no to her. You dont seem to have a selfish bone in your little body.
We call your dimple, your "kiss catcher". Your smile is like sunshine - all warmth and brightness and honesty.
You love people. You can be shy, but usually warm up to people remarkably fast, and love to touch buttons, necklaces and earrings - anything that gets you close to them, preferably into their laps.
You love to be swung around, and carried, but you dont like to do things on your own. Even walking over a steep bridge, the angle of it scares you, but I can hang you upside down by your ankles and you laugh yourself stupid.
And your laugh. Oh god, I dont think theres anybody left who isnt totally adoring of your laugh. Its quite possibly the best sound in the whole world.
You literally, roll out of bed each morning, right onto the floor. Its why you dont have a bed-frame yet. And you are usually smiley, in the morning. Bouncing up and asking for toast and juice and robots. Or sometimes, my faverate, is when you look at me and ask "Watch you doin here?"
You cling, when we carry you, and bury your head in our necks.
Your faverate foods are chicken nuggets, and fruit bars. and Wheaties. Although I think that last one is just to keep your sister from stealing your cheerios, because Ive started to notice that although you ask for them, you dont actually eat them much.
At this moment, I see you in the future in a job where touch is important. A doctor, a therapist. Something very tactile and personal.
That is, if you could ever get your memory up to par.
You get so frustrated, and lost, when you cant find your cup. Your sister these days, when she finds it, hands it to you forcefully and says "Here, cup!"
But she adores you, as much as you do her. And whenever you hurt yourself, she comes and brings you blankets, and your puppy, and hugs you, and tells you everythings ok. And every morning, when we drop her off for pre-school, you get a kiss goodbye.
I spoil you, a bit too much, when we go out together, while your sister is at school. You get upset, so easily, that sometimes, its the only thing I know to fix it. In another week or so, we take you to get your official diagnoses. I am both looking forward to, and dreading this. But to have it over and done with, will be good. For all of us.
Since putting you in my arms, three years ago, I have come to the solid conclusion that no woman's life is complete, until she has a son. Its possibly a terrible thing to say, but - I do feel sorry for them. I tell people "Your boy will look at you, every day, the way you only wish your husband would know how to"
I know you're a "mama's boy" but I think at three - thats still ok.
If at 16, your still this adoring and clingy, well, then Ill know somethings screwed up. *laughs*.
I cant say that I love you more then your sister. But shes so independent, and so - sassy, that I have a very different kind of love for her. With you, I am very much - "mama" and I adore it.
Happy birthday, my little snuggle-bug...
I love you.
beautiful.
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